So you want to become more "self-aware," but what does that mean? Generally, self-awareness is associated with a greater understanding of your emotions and how you tend to respond to those emotions. Through conscious practice, you can learn how to identify your emotional triggers and how they lead to various behaviors.
Dr. David Cox of the National Health Service likes to use a simple analogy to explain awareness versus non-awareness. “Imagine watching a horror movie alone, at home, with the lights off,” he says. “The movie owns you. It’s terrifying. It’s all you’re aware of and so it has complete control over your emotions.” Similarly, when you’re experiencing thoughts in a state of non-awareness, they can be scary and all-consuming. In contrast, awareness is like watching that same scary movie by yourself, but this time with the lights on. “With the lights on, you have more context,” explains Dr. Cox. You can see that the movie is in fact just a movie playing on TV, and that there are other things around you like your dog and your favorite pillow. “It’s still scary, but it’s not as bad as it is with the lights off because you have a bit more perspective.” (from Headspace)
How well do you know yourself? An aspect of self-awareness is the ability to understand how these factors (and many others) may contribute to your identity:
The practice of becoming more self-aware may be aided with meditation, mindfulness, conversations with friends and therapy. The articles What is Self-Awareness? And How Can You Cultivate it? and How to Be More Self Aware And Why It's Important suggest tips on how to develop a basic sense of self-awareness.
Self-Management builds on your self-awareness. By understanding and anticipating your emotional responses, you can train and regulate your behavior. Having the desire to change your responses, combined with a realistic sense of your needs and abilities, can result in effective behavioral change.
How To Master Your Emotions is a short video illustrating how one's background and experiences may influence emotion.
DBT Skills: Emotion Regulation and Acceptance
Naming and accepting our emotions is one way we can practice emotion regulation, an important Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Skill. DBT focuses on a way to understand, reframe, and modulate our emotional responses.
Emotion Regulation in DBT: Checking the Facts
Checking the facts is an emotional regulation skill that helps us change how we're feeling by making sure our emotions accurately fit the facts. A printable worksheet allows you to apply these techniques for yourself.
